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What can be done about the young people growing up today?

1 Dec

It is absolutely unbelievable to me how impaired young people are today. Political correctness gone wild … I am so tired of being called a racist, homophobic, Nazi, Elitist! I am not any of those things. But, I do say my truth. It may be different than someone else’s truth because of their background or indoctrination!
The fact that our colleges and universities have become so expensive and yet they are turning kids against their grandparents is shocking!! One of my favorite grandsons is refusing to talk to me right now, because of my views. Specifically, I said in my blog that I agreed with Meagan Kelly that “blackface” as a costume is harmless and no insult to blacks. And I believe that!
Now in my 70s I have more and more friends who are black. I consider them a blessing in my life. And yet, I am frequently called “racist”. Go figure!   When I was young and knew no one except casual servers who were black, then it was probably true.  If you want to end racism, you need to get people together.  Keeping them separate does not do it.  And yet, there is a black history month, and black students Union at some schools.  It is true that sometimes it is easier to be with people who are exactly like you, but no one is.


I don’t have an appropriate photo, so here is my dog, Magnus. He has manners and civility, both.

Today I went to a luncheon where most people disliked the President of the United States.  That is allowed, in this country. No one will arrest them for their views.  But, one man said something that has really made me think.  Someone asked “What ever happened to civility and manners?” And He said “That was before they began to calling manners and civility ‘Political Correctness’ and mocking them.”

This surprised me.  I NEVER think of manners as being politically correct.  Manners are simply manners.  But, it is true that Political Correctness stops conversation. It is true that it shames people, on purpose. To me Political Correctness is the thing that keeps us from being able to speak truthfully about anything that might be called a stereotype.  Where do you think Stereotypes come from? It comes from things being lumped together, rightly or wrongly.

Stereotype threat describes the experience of “being at risk of confirming, as self-characteristic, a negative stereotype of one’s group” (Steel & Aronson, 1995).
I had never heard of Stereotype threat until I began writing this blog.  It is a perfect example of the nonsense we are told daily. I “get it” but I do not agree that forcing people to avoid any possible chance of running into a stereotype is helping them.  People simply must “get a grip”.
I want to be free to say what I  believe without being traumatized by the threat of breaking some code of political correctness.  I have no intention of using bad manners. There is no reason for anything but civility.  So I do not understand that man’s saying that those who “mock” Political Correctness (that would be me) are contributing to a lack of manners or civility.

My contention is that we need a lot more of both of those things.  Manners are not taught to children like they once were.  And Civil disobedience is encouraged on school campuses.  No wonder we are living in a time when both are lacking.

A friend wrote about the young today:

“They need a taste of reality. For our parents, it was a World War, for us it was Viet Nam. These kids have seen no suffering. They have been been indulged, have no manners, and are incapable of serious logical thinking. “
I agree with him.


Copyright©.  2018 Bonnie B. Matheson

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White House Christmas Party

28 Nov

White House Christmas Party

What a Hoot!!! I was invited to the White House for their first 2018 Christmas Party.

This was so much fun!!! Maybe the MOST fun ever, at this esteemed residence. The size of the place is deceiving. You don’t realize how big it is until you approach the doors of the East Wing Lower Level where most guests enter for a large party.

It is huge. The size of the columns and the width of the door way, remind one immediately that this is a special place. Once inside we proceeded down a long hall decorated with bright red Christmas trees made of cranberries and other red berries. There was a bright green runner that went down the center of the very long room, for us to walk upon. The contrast of white walls, red trees and green floor covering was very festive.

Once all the way inside and upstairs, we wandered around the state rooms freely. We were allowed to take photos and we took a LOT. The food and drink were plentiful. The gingerbread construction of the replica of the White House and several monuments looked good enough to eat. Truly an extraordinary effort, I photographed it from different angles.

The feeling of excitement which permeated the air reminded us how lucky we were to be included.

Going to the White House is always fun. The food was so abundant. The presentation was so creative and tasted even better than it looked. The trays of smoked salmon, the condiments, the baby French Lamb chops, the mint jelly, the many cold meats, macaroni and cheese, string beans, the cheeses, the crackers and breads and the way they were all presented. Not knowing better, I ate a great deal while in the State Dining Room. There was also a bar and a station for egg nog both plain and spiked. There was a fabulous station for deserts and cookies. I snagged one to take home to my mother and wrapped in a paper napkin with a logo of the White House.

The White House Aids and all the servers showed great skill. There was music playing. Christmas carols sounded throughout the large rooms. The decorations, different in each chamber showed great imagination. Tasteful and opulent at the same time, they were fitting testament to the great history of this house.

As we walked, gawking and photographing from room to room, we finally arrived in the East Room. There I discovered even more food. Sadly, I was already so full, I could only look longingly at it. Then I discovered a ravioli station, and found a corner of my stomach to fit a bit more food into. Sublime! The most wonderful ravioli, 2 different types with sauce and condiments. So much fun, but when I came to the Beef Wellington there was simply no room left, to try to take a slice. I was told by my friend that it was delicious, also.
When the First Lady came down the stairs to make a short speech to welcome us, I was in exactly the correct place to be. I saw her graceful descent of the stairs. Snapping pictures as she turned a corner and went out of sight, I could hear her words clearly. And then as she returned to the second floor I was still there beneath the open grillwork of the stairs and watched her as she paused. She turned around and waved slowly to us, giving us more time to get the perfect shot. She is a gracious lady. And as pretty as you can imagine. She does not disappoint. 

What an experience! How special our President’s House, and how welcoming to us the guests. In my memory the visions of floral arrangements, Christmas trees and decorated mantels all blend together into the entire party, as a dream sequence of a movie in my mind.



Copyright©.  2018 Bonnie B. Matheson

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Do you know many snowflakes?

31 Oct

Do you know many snowflakes?

I am curious about the way the world is changing. It seems like a different place much of the time. Megan Kelly got fired (more or less) for saying that she did not think wearing “blackface” as part of a Halloween costume was bad or racist. WHAT???

She lost her job over politically incorrect speech? I am truly horrified. What is the world coming to? And why do people believe it is better to try to be evenhanded in all speech, rather than truthful. What the Hell is wrong with Blackface? Nothing!

What is wrong with dressing up as an Indian?  Dressing up is by definition, being someone whom you are NOT. It is not an insult to anyone. In fact, you could say it is a compliment to want to dress up as a different group from the one you are part of.

It makes me unbelievably cross to see our country cowering for fear of punishment over some minor indiscretion that may have been completely unintentional. What if it actually was intentional? Who cares? Ignore it.

Does no one remember the nursery rhyme “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me!”

When did we become so soft that hurtful words are banned? And yet at the same time many words once considered ‘swear words’ are used daily by just about everyone. What happened? Is it a plot by those who wish to overthrow the values with which we were all raised? I find it hard to believe that everyone is so thin skinned. And I can’t help but believe this is deliberate.

Back when this all started the teachers had a choice. The choice was to teach children to have self confidence and feel secure. Or to let them be so sensitive to words that they become “triggered” by certain words and phrases. It is clear what happened. The children today, who are grown up enough to be in College, need “safe spaces” where their feelings won’t be hurt by any stray “insensitive words”

Who will lead us when this generation reaches Leadership age? Who will be strong enough emotionally to stand up to those other countries who may wish us harm? Some despotic leader might say a mean thing to the President and he (or she), might start to cry. Seriously!!! It shocks me when I think of how tough our ancestors were. I just don’t understand who thinks it is a good thing to encumber people in this way. The way of thinking that leads to political correctness is a sure way to oblivion for our species. This is not racially exclusive. These people are every color and ethnic group. They are all scared of each other. They may say something that might be considered disparaging. Get a grip!!!

Grow up! Join the Marines! That might fix some of them. But of course most would drop out after a few days. They absolutely do not have what it takes. They are called snowflakes for a good reason. They melt as soon as things heat up.

I hope none of my grandchildren are so fragile. And I wish for all of these people to take a look around. Real life is messy, and scary and hard. But for the most part in the United States there is VERY LITTLE actual racism, very few people discriminate against women in the workplace, no one cares what gender anyone else is, just stay out of the bathroom of which ever one you are NOT dressed for. If you look like a man use the men’s room. If you look like a girl use the ladies room. How hard is that?

What would they do if they suddenly found themselves alone in the wilderness? DO they think they could survive? Do any these children go away to camp? Do they have real life experiences of deprivation? Do they hike and get wet and lose their food and shelter and still come out alive the next day? Do they know what to do if they become cold while lost in the woods? Would they have any idea of where to find water?

I have no faith in their ability to survive one day much less weeks and months. I wonder how much they would care about the “choice of words” in a life or death situation between themselves and nature?

There is no cure that comes to mind. What I fear is that the situation will become so toxic that violence will ensue. When it is war, perhaps these same people will be able to straighten out their priorities. I hope we never have to find out that way.

To all the young people who have been triggered by words they don’t like, I would like to say this. PLEASE, be more realistic about what you can expect others to do to accommodate your likes and dislikes. You may just have to like it or lump it.  (Like we always have.)


Copyright©. 2018 Bonnie B. Matheson

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